Category Archives: self-worth

Ignorance and Confidence – Thought for December 29, 2014

To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.

Mark Twain

What does this quote mean? Good question. I went online and did a little reading on this quote and I found this opinion in a forum that really resonated with me:

I think the meaning of ignorance in this saying means, to ignore people or things that are unimportant to what you are trying to achieve in your life.Only focus on what is fundamental to your progression. Just use what´s relevant and don´t let traditional values or concepts that society or people have forced upon everyone, influence you, your thoughts or your actions. I think it means to be different …the majority of people are afraid of people who are different

Being ignorant is not being stupid, it is being unaware of something. So in this case it would mean being unaware of what others think that you should be.

It would mean acting and living the way that you want to, regardless of all of the “inside the box” thinkers out there. Doing things that make you happy, that make you and your family able to feel the freedom to be who they really are.

  • Standing in a long line at Wal-Mart waiting to be checked out by a disgruntled employee that really doesn’t want to be there.
  • Only listening to music that is played on the local “Hits” radio station because that is what everyone else is listening to
  • Working at a job that you hate because everyone tells you that it is the only way “to get ahead”

Been there, done that, don’t want to go back!

We only get one chance at this. Life was not meant to be lived according to others. Living life on life’s terms does NOT mean that you have to let everyone and everything control you, it means that we need to learn how to deal with life HEAD ON, not to run and hide from it.

Dance like no one is watching

Sing like no one is listening

Live like it is your last day on earth.

Have the confidence to do the things that you want to do.

That is what Ignorance and Confidence means to me!

With Much Respect

Mark and Michelle Eaves


I Value Honesty Yet I Lied for Years « Positively Positive

I Value Honesty Yet I Lied for Years « Positively Positive.

Very interesting viewpoint/article, can totally relate. I too lived nothing but lies for years, but was aghast at anyone that lied to me. How messed up is that?!

I am what I am, like it or not. Just need to get my thinking out of the way of things sometimes

Honesty

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mark


Does Spirituality Only Come From Suffering?


Truth About Happiness

http://wp.me/p54tXD-48

Found this Tony Robbins video this morning and posted it on http://www.startsat50.com, wanted to share it here as well

It is about 30 minutes long but is very good (my opinion) and relevant to me


Getting to the Soul of Gratitude Practice

Getting to the Soul of Gratitude Practice.

Day nine in this series on meditation. Gratitude, it crossed my mind last night.

I have a lot to be grateful for, even things that I would never have thought that I could be grateful for. Things that seemed like negatives in my life that if they never happened,  my eyes never would have opened up to what I really have

Enjoy

Mark


Atty-Tude of Gratty-Tude

henrydavidthoreau106041Came across this quote today.

I know that it is not anything new or anything that I haven’t seen before, but for some reason it struck me differently (I think)

It is amazing how the world looks when I have a better attitude about life, and vice versa. I have a friend that always reminds me that I need to develop an Atty-tude of Gratty-tude (yes, that is how he says it) and he is right.

I have so much to be grateful for, yet I still tend to dwell on other things, on negatives. Definitely not as much as I used to, but it is still there.

My atty-tude is a work in progress I guess. Today I am grateful and that is really all that matters RIGHT NOW.

Enjoy your weekend!

Mark


Maybe It’s Not Them

What is it that makes people think that if you don’t talk about something, it (or they) will go away?

Present company included. For the longest time, if something came up or someone close to me acted a certain way, then I would do everything in my power to look the other way and hope that it will sort itself out. And the funny part is that it did, or at least I thought it did.

If there was some situation that I needed to address at work or at home, just look the other way and act like I know what I am doing. For God’s sake don’t ask what is going on or try to get to the root of the problem. That would be too much like work. (Gasp!) Eventually something else will come along and that first situation will not be so important, or even better, the situation takes care of itself and then I can stand back, throw my hands in the air and act like I knew nothing about it and none of the ramifications would be my fault. That was my MO, my modus operandi, my method of operation.

Didn’t talk about family issues outside of the house, for fear that “someone find out.” Find out that we weren’t perfect? That we have issues just like every family in the world?

And now Facebook comes along and I am sure that a lot of people that grew up before the internet age (yes, there was life before the internet) are just rolling in their graves because everyone’s dirty laundry is being aired for the world to know about. I was recently warned to be careful about what I put on Facebook, because people might find out stuff about me that could be embarrassing.

eccentricEvery family has someone that is not “normal”. Maybe I am that person in my family. I have done some things in my life that I am not proud of, things that hurt my family and probably embarrassed them. It has gotten easier over the years to talk about some of them, but there are some that are just too taboo to even bring up. In fact there is a good chance that I am the only one that still thinks about them.

But one thing that I have learned very recently is that these things do not go away. They get buried inside and fester and wait, they are very patient. They build up resentments, either against another person or more often than not against myself. I had to do some very serious soul searching and get all of these issues written down on paper, and then talk to someone about them. There was no other way I was told, that if I wanted to start healing, then they had to come out.

Now I didn’t go off half-cocked and start telling everyone that would listen all of the sordid stories of my past, but I did find someone that I knew that I could trust and I told him everything. I talked about things that I had honestly planned on taking to the grave with me. It was a cleansing of sorts. It was amazing the amount of (self-inflicted) pressure that it took off of my shoulders, just being able to get it out, after almost 30 years of just trying to bury it.

What is my point? Just that we often condemn people for being different, for not being like us. That too often that person is just looking, crying out for someone to listen to them and to try to understand why they act like they do. We were just talking last night about a famous comedian who admitted that he often locks himself in his bedroom for days at a time when he is not performing. Robin Williams, one of the funniest men I have ever heard, committed suicide. They try to make us laugh, to feel good about ourselves, but who does that for them? I guess we figure that if we see someone acting a fool and cracking jokes, that he is happy. That might not be the case, at least it wasn’t in my situation. I always tried to put on a happy outer appearance so that people would not try to get inside, it just seemed easier that way.

empathy-quoteI am as guilty as anyone for shunning people for being outrageous or eccentric or just plain different. And I need to stop judging them and maybe, just maybe get to know them a little better, to understand why they are like they are. I know how it feels to think that you are being shunned, so you try to be something that you are not just to get acceptance, just to fit in. And for anyone that I ever did that to in the past, I apologize.

So for all the eccentric aunts and uncles, for all the “Cousin Its” out there that are shunned or cast aside because you are not like everyone else, keep being yourself. You might not be the one that needs to change!

Mark



The Good “Old” Days

Glory Days. . . .

Ah. . .those were the best days of my life!

Hey, you remember that time. . . . .?

It just don’t get better than that!

Umm. . .yeah it does!

Yes, it WILL

There is nothing that has happened to me in my life that I cannot improve upon (wedding day and birth of children excluded).

Why does everyone talk about the past as if it was the best time of their life? What about today? What about NOW?

Why can’t this be the best time of your life?

There is a saying that goes like this. “If I have one foot in yesterday and one foot in tomorrow, then I am pissing all over today!”

Living in the past wondering what I could have or should have done differently had gotten me nowhere. The only thing that I can do about my past is to learn from it, and there are a LOT of lessons there, trust me!

Worrying about what is going to happen tomorrow, or next week, or next year just tends to leave me wondering about the past when all of my grandiose plans do not come true, mostly from my inability to start things or see things through to fruition.

It needs to start now. No more excuses!

Now here is the point where everyone rolls their eyes and I feel good about what I just wrote for about 15 minutes, and then life goes on.

I can’t keep doing that. I am pretty much out of options at this point if I do not get my sh!t together. I could have written about all of the bad things that have happened to me in my lifetime, and there have been many, most of which were self-inflicted, but that won’t mean much.

I could write about what is on my bucket list, which I kind of have up in one of those rusty old file cabinets in my head, but how is that going to help to talk about the good ol’ days?

For me, the good ol’ days need to be every day that I wake up and am able to get out of bed and live life. To be able to be thankful for all that I do have, not be regretful for all that I don’t have or never had.

The good ol’ days need to start every morning with me getting on my knees and thanking God that I have another chance, that I am alive for one more day.

The good ol’ days need to end every night with me getting on my knees and thanking God for that one day.

Falling LeavesThe good ol’ days need to be everything in between, and if I do everything in my power to live, to be a good person. To tell the people that I love, that I love them. To be there when someone who is struggling needs someone, just like all the people that were there for me when I was struggling. To look at the trees and the green grass and just know what a miracle it is that we all are living on this planet that can sustain life the way it does. To breathe in that cool crisp fall air as the leaves say good bye to the tree that they have been holding on to for months and fall to the ground, knowing that come spring there will be new leaves on the trees so that the circle of life can continue.

So yes, I do have stories about the good old days in my life that I wish to share, and they are happening right now.

So join me if you will on this new and ever changing journey that I like to call. . . . Life

life

 


The Best Gift

Store bought gift?

Handmade gift?

Which is better?

For me there is one gift that far exceeds any other. It doesn’t come from a store and it cannot be created or hand made.

Nothing else even comes close to it.

For most of my life I always thought that I had to buy happiness, to buy love. That the most important thing was to always have money in my pocket and feel like a big shot by buying useless things for people that really didn’t care one way or another.

That the only way to be successful was to make as much money as possible and that the only way to succeed is to work, work, and work and then feel superior to others because I worked harder than them. The thing about that is that no matter how much money I made, it never seemed to be enough. And no matter how much I worked, it was never enough. I lost track of everything that should have been important to me. No, let me rephrase that.

I NEVER GAVE MYSELF A CHANCE TO LEARN WHAT SHOULD BE IMPORTANT TO ME.

I am writing this after spending the last 3 weeks working 12-14 hours a day, so does this make me a hypocrite? Maybe. . .

I am hoping that the difference this time is that I have had several months to learn about myself and to learn about the people around me that love me, because I am ME. Not for what I am, but for who I am.

I still need to work and it felt good to go to work every day and to get done what we set out to accomplished. Sure I was tired and sure I missed all the people that I have surrounded myself with at this point in my life, my support group or whatever you want to call it. But I think that might be the difference. In the past, I worked without thinking about anyone but myself. I worked and left others to take care of things like raising our kids. I missed out on so much and it is something that I can never get back.

I am writing this as a reminder to myself. That even though I do have to work, I cannot let it become “my everything” again. I have learned so much and been given so much over the past 8 months, given freely I might add, that I have to remember what got me to this point. It was not my doing. There was definitely Divine Intervention happening in my life, and there still is.

So that gift I was talking about earlier, the best gift ever?

To me, it is the gift of unconditional love that I receive every day from family and friends, and especially from my Higher Power, who I choose to call God.

Without it, I am nothing.

With it, I can be anything


Much Respect and Love

Mark

 



Perspective of Inequality

in·e·qual·i·ty
ˌinəˈkwälədē/
noun
noun: inequality; plural noun: inequalities
  1. difference in size, degree, circumstances, etc.; lack of equality.
    Based on the definition of equality above, wouldn’t everyone feel inequality? And wouldn’t that be a good thing?
    I mean, why would we all want to live the exact same lives as anyone else? Why would we want to be held to the same standards as anyone else? And why would we want to be held to anyone else’s standards, except maybe God’s?!
    Of course this is simplifying things a whole lot, or is it? Yes, I do understand that there are people that live in circumstances not of their making and they have no way out of them. But there are also people that put themselves into situations even though they do have the ability to get themselves out of them, and those are the people that seem to complain the loudest.
    We all feel inequality at some point. Be it socially, emotionally or physically. The problem, in my opinion, is when we feel this inequality and, rather than trying to make a change in OURSELVES, we complain about what the other person has or is. We cannot change other people, no matter how hard we try.
    Trying to get others to change to make me feel better is not working, so it is up to me to change.
    Anyone else in?